The Next Installment

Welcome to 2014!!!

I’m sitting in bed still at 11am…. This is a good sign that 2014 will be a better year than 2013 was. Putting it bluntly – 2013 sucked! Far too much turmoil and stress!

For those who do not know me – staying in bed, for me, is something I MIGHT get to do once every few years.  – a REAL rarity!

So far, I have discovered that Ms Honey Bunny is having a BLAST with the 4 stacks of boxes and plastic tubs. I have placed them strategically in piles of varying heights. She has discovered the benefits of each box stack. The Amazon boxes – 2 stacked on top next to one creating the effect of stairs – she jumps up and down and up and down and chews on the box. The plastic ones are just for effect. The coup d’ grace however, is the long ceiling fan box on its side…… this one, she jumps up on to sliiiidddddeeeeeee across the top….   Rabbits are as easily amused as cats. I like that in a furbaby!

That said, my first purchase of 2014 will be a cat tree….. Yes, the cats will enjoy it – however, I believe Ms. Honey will like it more!

                           __________________________________________

I have spent the morning on the laptop, sometimes on Facebook – but, most of the time, I have been perusing the “Vintage Children’s Book” pages of Etsy for …………… well…. Yeah – vintage children’s books. In particular – the earlier printings of the Judy Bolton, Cherry Ames, Nancy Drew, Penny Parker, and Sue Barton mystery series books.  Etsy seems to have a plethora of these – almost ever time I look, I find another to add to my collection.

No, I am not a collector of teen novela’s of yesteryear….   I am an avid reader. And have been since the age of 8 when my wonderful Aunt Edna introduced me to these books. They were originally bought for her when she was a girl. Many were printed in the 1930’s. Grossett & Dunlap were the printers of said books, all of which had hard covers and were printed on a very thick paper – akin to two or more sheets of construction paper. The pages are yellowed to begin with and have gotten more so over the years. 

I am very particular about which printings I purchase, preferring the first or second printing.  I am very drawn to these printings as they were set in the era in which they were written – the 1930’s. Some – like Nan Sherwood – were printed around the turn of the century.

Of these book series I have mentioned, only Nancy Drew and Cherry Ames survived into the 60’s and 70’s. Cherry simply ‘grew with the times’ – and sometime in the 70’s, faded into the “Land of Unread Books”. Nancy, (and her counterparts – the Hardy Boys) survive even today. However, those two series were REWRITTEN and reprinted several times – and modernized. I’m not sure what Nancy (is her last name still “Drew” or did she finally marry Ned?) is driving these days but I am positive it is NOT the ‘Roadster’ of her 1930’s days.

I know what has been in my lifetime  - If she is driving an Infiniti I30T – you GO Nancy – but, I know what those are like….  I’ve seen plenty. But a Roadster….. Gee whiz! Now THAT’S a car!!! Does anyone know what an automat is? Or an Underwood? (yeah – that thing with the keys that looks sort of like a computer keyboard except bigger, noisier and at least 20 pounds heavier?) . Anyone remember home-delivered groceries? Nope – not Peapod – that’s the new version of the old scene! 

Updating Nancy & her ‘chums’ (who became ‘pals’ and then ‘friends’ and, now, I’m certain they are BFF’s) is all well and good for sales to the current generation I suppose. But, I prefer to read the older models.  What is worse I suppose is that very few people do prefer those – unless, of course, they are collectors of books. I suppose you could call me a collector – but, not for the value. The monetary value means less than nothing to me. What I LOVE is filling in gaps in my collection – like having volumes 1-6, 9, 10, 12 and 18 – and finding volumes 7, 8, and 11! I read them as I get them first;. Then go back and read volumes 1 – 12 all inclusive! This gives me a clear picture of my heroines’ life and times!

Perhaps I should have been an anthropologist?

                                __________________________________________________

This year, I have much to do. Retirement from the world of Big Business is in sight – but I have not yet decided what I want to be when I grow up. I have to blame some of the lack of decision on not knowing all the possibilities that are out there. I am constantly amazed at the jobs and fields – things that I take for granted. Like where do new colors come from? From companies that specialize in color development of course….. what? Yes… color development is a science every bit as much as mathematics. Who knew? Party planning – another career alternative. So… no cooking? No cleaning. Just co-ordinating?  Sober companions… OMG!!!! Although it helps to have gotten sober once yourself, it is not a requirement. So… someone pays you to stay with them after rehab for a bit and yell at them if you think they are heading back down the proverbial slippery slope? Real estate ‘stagers”.  The broker prices the house, the realtor sells it – but will engage the services of a stager – who is kind of an interior decorator of empty homes – in order to make the property “pleasing” to potential buyers….  (Now, IMHO, if you can’t see the potential in a residence without someone else decorating it for you – why are you even BUYING ?? ) .

The scary part of this is that our “for profit” industry of ‘Education’ has determined that ALL career paths require extensive education beyond that which is required by local law. And they have convinced all their cronies in other ‘for profit’ industries that this is true.  Further, they have brainwashed US common folk into believing that this is a necessity. We actually believe that you can’t do color analysis or decorate a home unless you have been through an institute of higher learning – either with the core “liberal arts” courses or just the specialty.

So, let me get this straight…. Unless you are a good student (I’m not even going to TOUCH the subject of the outrageous cost of this excessive education) -  you can’t be a good _______ (fill in blank with your favorite job that SHOULD NOT require a degree).  Hmmmmmmmm.

Ok – I’m all for learning. I really abhor people who are stupid or ignorant by choice.

I believe in learning something new every day. I LOVE to learn. Which is why I ADORE the internet … I read, I don’t know, I google. I read, I want to know more – I google. I read several different news site daily. I read books – primarily fiction – but, the fiction is what piques my interest in the facts behind the fiction.  All fiction has a basis in fact – if one wishes to know if something is real or truly fictitious – google. Or bing.  Or…

Know what I can’t do?  I can’t sit in a classroom, take notes, and learn. No, really – I can’t. Ok, well, yes, I can. But – what this type of learning gives me is only good for playing Trivial Pursuit. I remember (by rote) exactly what I need to… and yep, I can pass an average college course with a decent grade. But, here is the problem…. It doesn’t MEAN anything.  

What means something: what I early on (as were many in my generation) to INFER unknown meanings from known meanings. I can understand an unknown word from the context in which it is used.

If I am taught the basics and handed a good reference manual, I can solve a problem.  I understand the problem based on what I already know about the general topic of the problem. What I do not know, I ask about.  Based on having seen real-life answers to other problems and understanding the problem and WHY it is a problem – I can design a solution to the problem – and carry it through to implementation.. I can do this having one 2 or 5 day class and a manual (and let us not forget Sparky – that Mighty Brain Cell!).

So, what did an extra 2 years of English, Mathematics, Economics, and History (all “General” subjects by the way) do exactly to help me solve the business problem better?  Not a dam thing.

This is a subject that I could go on about all day – every aspect – and there are MANY!!!!  My bottom line? In most cases, higher education is unnecessary and experience is the best teacher. And sadly, one thing that life has taught me is if you want to know what the REAL root reason for ANYTHING – all you need to do is follow the money. 

Money (kudo’s to Ms Lauper) changes everything.  A sad attestation to what we’ve become.

                                    __________________________________________

Sounds like starting the New Year off on a bad note – but I’m not really. This is today’s reality. It doesn’t have to be FOREVER reality.  I, for one, refuse to accept this as a “forever reality”. It can change. Probably not in my lifetime – but, it can change.

Perhaps I can help start the change…….. I shall have to consider that as I contemplate my next career. This will be one of my goals for 2014 – to figure out how to have a second career that I enjoy AND change the world at the same time.

Getting High

I have a seriously guilty secret. I LOVE getting high. Yep....  I do. Getting high is my life's passion - a feeling like no other. You feel it from the core of you expanding out to the tips of your fingers and toes. It builds and builds till it just BURSTS forth from inside filling you with the most indescribably delicious warmth!
Joy. Pure, unadulterated Joy.
I wish I could bottle and sell that feeling.
I know for sure I'd be financially well off! 
Bet ya'all are just drooling to know the details... How do I do it? Crack? Weed? What doctor writes my prescription? Who is my dealer? What street corner do I stand on? How can I possibly afford to get high?
Well... I'm gonna tell ya.
My high is free.
Yep.
Free.
No cash.
Really.
I can hear you all now....... "what connections does SHE have?!?!" and "Dam, I want me some of that!"
Well - you can have it.
I'll gladly share.
the how.

Let me tell you a little story to illustrate....  Almost 20 years ago, my kids told me to shut up.  Yep... me. the lady who sings ALL THE TIME!  "Shut up, mom" they said.  "PLEASE!!!", they said. "You sound HORRIBLE - like a dead frog!".  Sad part is - they were right. 
And then I got this sinus infection that wouldn't quit. Antibiotics didn't touch it. UGH!
Somehow, the brain grabbed control of me from the heart.  I'm not sure how - cuz the heart NEVER  EVER lets the brain win. But, this time it did.
Wait! I know you are bored.... I'm sorry. but revealing my guilty secret requires SOME build up - after all, it IS my guilty secret!
And I'm about to tell you all how to get high for free! So - be patient and allow me my small pleasure.
Now........... where was I........ 
Oh - right, brain won. 
So, I stopped (just for a day) that ugly thing I had been doing for more than 20 years....  Just to see if maybe, as a last ditch effort, THAT might help rid me of this sinus infection. 
Two days later...........  I got high for the first time.  
On my front porch. In front of a LOT of underage kids. 
I know.... terrible of me. 
I'm a HORRIBLE influence.... I know. How could I do that in front of LITTLE KIDS! 
I just could not help myself. And once I started - I just could NOT stop! I mean, that feeling is LIFE CHANGING! 

Oh...........
right
you want to know what drug and who my dealer is....
ok...
Guess its time.... 
Ok... my guilty secret and drug of choice...

Are you sure you can handle it? No really - its addicting. Once you have it, you CAN"T let it go. There are NO detox programs to help you with this.... maybe one day there will be - but right now, if you choose to do what I did - there is no going back and no hope of rescue... You can't be saved from this drug. You can never be free of it. Searching for that high will occupy your whole life! It will consume you! 
Are you sure you want to know? Are you sure you want to? 

Ok...
Don't say I didn't warn you. 

My drug of choice?
Music.

Yep. Music. 
No prescription or dealer necessary.

There is NO high like being part of a group that blends perfectly and performs a piece as if the piece was written for them. There is NO high like playing a song you love and knowing when you finish that you played it PERFECTLY - with your whole heart in it! So much so that your whole heart is exposed for all the world to see because it LEAPS out of your chest with a life of its own. There is no high like hitting a perfect note perfectly - TWICE! 

Ok... well, maybe there is another high like that.
But just one..........
Seeing a sunrise in the company of the fey creatures of the woodland.... 

Watching that beautiful ball of fire gently slip up from the ocean floor where it had rested overnight.... slowly changing the midnight blue of the sky and sea a much brighter azure with overlappying bold brush strokes of gold! To see the deep evergreen of the forest change to a brilliant emerald with streaks of chartreuse and fawn....
Yep - I'm so embarrassed.
But, I had to 'come out' - it is just necessary for my soul to share this guilty secret with the world. Its part of my therapy.... 
Oh - and my dealer? 
Yes... 
I suppose you need to know that too. 
After all, you'll need the same prescription I have - so, I guess you'll need to know who to go to. 
Wait..... I can't tell you my dealers name. 
Oh no.... 
That is just too much....
I don't know... 
Hum...
Well... ok.... I guess...............


you.

yes.
you.
all this happiness and joy - its inside you. 
you have to find your own key - that is something I can't give away - its a part of me.  

Joy. 
No $ required. 

May the Spirit of this Holiday Season grant your soul the peace and serenity it craves. 

The Lioness' 'New' Den

Before my friend re-appeared, I wondered if I was retreating into my mind.... wondered if I did totally retreat - would I (could I) come back? Concentration eluded me despite the ADHD meds I take. I was wandering lost in the past with no intention of returning to reality. It is amazing the changes just a few weeks can make. Energy was non-existent. Even my therapist was discouraged. 
What a difference a few weeks can make!
With the assistance of my friend and ex-husband, I "cleaned house" - requiring all current boarders to find other lodgings. This edict was well-met by most of the 'flophouse' denizens. Some required a reminder or two. However, all are now OUT. 
My daughter has spread her wings and found a new 'roost' - her first apartment, with two others. I believe this is a positive thing both for her and me. She will grow and learn - but not so far from home that she can't run home when she needs to..... like to do her laundry.
There are now only 3 humans, 2 felines, and one lagomorph residing here. This is the smallest population of this home in 10 years! It almost feels empty! The house is more welcoming now. And more organized. And more clean!
With the constant nudges and pushes from my friend - I am slowly regaining control of many things - and I have seen the first glimmer of hope for my son's recovery and eventual entrance to the "real world". 
I have had someone to talk to on a regular basis who actually understood where I've been and why - and where my son had been and why.  I have my own personal "cheering section". 
My friend has needed his own personal "cheering section" too - and has one. There have been  many impromptu meetings of the "Mutual Aid Society" over dinner or fresh cups of coffee...... 
But the funniest thing?
If a fly were on the wall watching the two of us passing each other carrying on full conversations with ourselves and ignoring each other completely - the fly would be collapsed in mirth (as I have been every time I see this phenomena and become aware of it!).
The progress in both our lives is slow. But, that there is progress is most wondrous indeed!

Ephiphany

Most days, I am what one might call a mouse. Rarely, the mouse turns into a lioness. The mouse, who is usually running the show called 'Beth' is happy when everyone in her world is happy. To that end, I prefer to pour oil on troubled waters rather than try to part them. Intelligent discussions or debates I welcome. When it gets to the jumping up and down and arm waving and loud voices - then the mouse pours oil on the water and runs away. To me, that is exhausting. 
In the years since my divorce - I have run my house this way. Often fighting with my daughter to get her to do the things she needs to do. After so many years of wrangling and wrestling with her, and the years of trying to have a successful relationship with a man I loved deeply, I got too exhausted and tried to scurry back into my mousehole to lick my wounds. The problem with this is that I had one more child. Who also needed me to put my foot down and wrangle and wrestle with him. I didn't. Mom fell down. Mom became the easily manipulated doormat. 
One of the things I've needed desperately was support. I got a LOT of support from my parents - all the years my kids were growing up.  My kids would NEVER have had the life they have had were it not for my parents. My mom and dad did all the things with my kids that I wish I could have done - but, as a single mom,  I had to 'keep the lights on'. 
Still, I needed more. More support. I thought I would get that support from that relationship - but, that person - well, suffice it to say, he just simply was not capable emotionally or mentally of supporting anyone except himself. This is not reflective of him, per se. Each person can only handle what they can handle - not everyone can handle the same amount of stress. 

In the last month, a very good friend literally 'arose from the dead'. He came back into my life. This friend is really supporting me. Exactly the way I need to be supported. Talking.... pushing, occasionally giving me the 'hairy eyeball'. Reasoning. Intelligence.
Over the last 2 weeks, he has spent time talking with me. This is a 2-way street - he has needed the support from me to help pull his life back together as well. Over this two week period, I have gradually been emerging from the mousehole - beginning to find the person that used to be able to make decisions and STICK to them.
For the last week, I have been working up to today..... this evening. I almost feel bad for my kids. They are both about to have their little bubbles burst. She is ready - she will be ok - better even - for  this. He - not a snowballs chance. But, right now, he needs the 'tough love'. Till today, I have not been capable of that. I don't feel capable of that even now. But, I'm going to put one foot in front of the other and fall forward. I know I have the support. I'm petrified too - I don't know what the final outcome will be. It could be that even the 'tough love' will fail. But - I've tried everything else. And still - my son spirals downward. So - here we go. 
The lioness is emerging from her den.................

A Postulation

Most people, myself included, prefer 'good' over 'evil'. Most people also try to be as good as they can be (considering we are all imperfect humans). Because we see both good and evil, and we mostly prefer good, we also wonder why, if evil is evil - why does it exist? Some go further and attempt to eradicate evil. 
So, what IS evil? and -what IS good? 
Further, how would one ever know something was "good" if there were no "evil" to compare it to? "Good" and "Evil" are concepts.... "Love" and "Hate" - these are emotions. They are also concepts. These words do not identify tangible things. You can not see, touch, hear, or smell any of these as they have no physical attributes. 
These words are humanity's best attempt at defining intangible concepts. 
Yet, every act, every thought, every thing, every view - these can all be viewed from different perspectives. Different perspectives shed different lights on things. A perspective can make good seem evil. A perspective can also make evil seem good.
Consider......... Mother Theresa - the majority world view of Mother Theresa was that of a good woman who dedicated her life to helping others. Yet, the 'Devils Advocate' was able to take many of her acts which appeared to most as acts of kindness - and turn them around to appear selfish and evil. (And before you jump up and down (as did I, at first) - remember that is what the Devils Advocate is SUPPOSED to do.) 
Consider........... Adolf Hitler - the majority world view of Adolf Hitler was that of a maniacal despot. Yet, his populace truly believed he was good. 
Two people. One which history remembers as 'Good' and the other which history remembers as 'Evil'.

The absence of all color, we define as white.
The presence of all color, we define as black.
Therefore, the presence of one concept indicates the absence of its antithesis. 
Doesn't it?

I would so like to change the world. I would so love all people to be good and kind to each other. To love one another as they love themselves. I would like "To teach the world to sing in perfect harmony".... Yet, if  dissonance were not present, how would I know what perfect harmony is? 

"To everything there is a season and a time for every purpose under heaven." 

My personal conclusions:
1.) Every concept is relative.
2.) Every concept is viewed differently by every person. This is directly due to conclusion 1.
3.) All concepts are compiled within each persons mind. 
4.) These personal concept definitions fluctuate due to constant new inputs. 
5.) It is neither possible nor advisable to rid the world of 'evil'. Without evil, we would not have any understanding of 'good'. Conversely, without 'good', there would be no understanding of 'evil'. 

Final Conclusion:
With all this in mind, it seems to me that the very best that humankind can aspire to is acceptance of our differences. Without these differences, we would be automatons.... robots. 

Inhuman..........


Acceptance.
for ALL 
period. 
 

Back to the Future?

As I was reading the news over the last few days, Yahoo's CEO's edict fairly jumped out at me. A woman - and new mom - had reached the conclusion that telecommuting arrangements were bad for the business and terminated the telecommute policy company wide. 
What startled me even more was reading some of the comments on the article - many from bosses and business owners - that completely supported the decision. Some stating baldly that this was her right as a CEO and if the workers did not like it - too bad. 

Before beginning my diatribe, let me first state that I am completely FOR telecommuting for those jobs which can be done from home.  In fact, I have telecommuted part time for over 25 years. For the last 7, I have worked from home full time. I am a single mother of two children and a database administrator. My co-workers have been remote from me (Atlanta GA, St. Louis MO, Fairfield CA, Dallas TX, etc) since 1998 - all require a telephone call regardless of whether I am in an office or at home. The only difference is the telephone number my co-workers have needed to dial. 
I have been through several ups and downs with telecommuting.... not available, available only in dire necessity situations, not available, available with permission from the president and the Pope, available....) 
In the early 1990's in our state, it was a politically astute thing to support telecommute arrangements. Car pooling and Van pooling to save the environment was a focal issue. The company I worked for made HUGE and amazing inroads into making this functionality available wherever possible. They even had some of our call center positions set up for telecommute. It worked - WELL!
Several things contributed to the success of this program. The attitude of the majority of the workers who were allowed to telecommute was that of workers who had been given a HUGE benefit and appreciated it. Many hourly employees worked longer hours - without charging. Salaried employees were happier and more willing to do the off-hour work. (Just because its expected doesn't mean we LIKE it!).  Profits went up. Morale went up. Productivity went up. Due dates were not missed - in fact, many projects came in ahead of schedule and under budget. Sick time went WAY down.
Yes, we had our share of people who abused this gift. There are always people who will be paid for doing absolutely nothing. This is true whether they are in an office or at home. When they were caught, they were appropriately disciplined - first and foremost by having their telecommute privilege terminated, and in some cases - they were simply terminated.
In 1998, our company was swallowed by a larger 'fish'. Telecommute arrangements were terminated completely by the 'swallowing fish'. From that point, thru today, it has been an up and down thing determined by the wind direction. 
All this history (and my bias) presented, let me begin my tome.
                               ______________________________________
The first point I will address: Why would a web corporation with a global presence terminate one of the biggest perks to come a technology workers way since the dawn of the computer?

From a business perspective, this does not seem, at least to me, to be a healthy move for the corporation. It certainly is not the way to attract or retain talent. It also leads to overhead as the company now requires a desk space for each person (as opposed to desk-sharing, or "hotel" desks - vacant until needed).  It seems to me that it is highly likely that the talented individuals will start casting around for other ships to jump to. Certainly, those that CAN jump ship will be the ones with the talent - logically. So, while there may be no layoffs, the individuals left will be either those whose financial or home situations are significantly adversely impacted by transitioning to another job/corporation AND/OR  those who, while good, are not the "Best of the best". These will stay - however, not happily. Unhappy employees - especially those who are forced back to the water cooler - will frequently utilize that water cooler time to air their unhappiness - as opposed to collaborating on the newest deliverable. 
This also significantly limits the potential hiring pool - when one does hire, ones choices are limited by the commute. If, for example,  the corporate office is in Fairfield, California - I cannot hope to attract talent from Atlanta, Georgia or Hartford, Connecticut. This is true even with a 'moving' allowance. The reason? If I sell my home in GA, I will not be able to purchase a similar home in CA because the housing market is vastly disparate.  This is a concern that has been voiced by many a CEO - the inability to find the talent and education needed to fulfill certain positions.
I do believe this edict will solidify her position among others in positions of power.  By and large, corporate positions of power are predominantly male-held. Coincidentally, the holders of these positions of power are also predominantly against telecommuting.  Among the "good old boys" -  CIO's, CFO's, CEO's, COO's at the top of many corporations - there are many who have paid 'lip service' to telecommuting depending on whether it was politically the correct thing to do or not. When we were up in arms over the skyrocketing prices of gasoline, allowing telecommuting was a politically astute move. Now that we have 'settled down' and seemingly accepted the outrageous prices at the pump, there is no political wind blowing in the favor of telecommuting.
Is this a good move for her career? In the short run - perhaps. She runs a tighter, more controlled ship which ascribes to the "warm body in chair = work" theory of management. In the long run? I truly believe this will do more harm to Yahoo as a whole with the more sublime talent jumping on-board for Yahoo's competitors. 
And as morale spirals downward, so too will the corporation. 
With multitudinous people competing for the few available jobs, this is the correct time to enact such a measure. But, as with everything, the worm will turn yet again.

                              ____________________________________________

I have also read that this same woman was having a daycare room built right next to her office to accommodate her child.  This is the second thing I would like to address.

As a working mom, this is a HUGE insult to me.  First, you have terminated the very BEST perk I could possibly have to assist me in balancing the two major priorities in my life. And then you have your child in a room right next to your office - yet my child must go to a daycare. These actions do not inspire loyalty or drive. They do not provide incentive to be the best that I can be at my job. This action by a superior also does not inspire my respect. This action inspires derision - a very unladylike snort, if you will, of abject disgust.
For the parents whose primary career is being a parent, with a secondary career in an office, this will make an already difficult balance to maintain an IMPOSSIBLE one. 
This is nothing less than a return to the days of owing your soul to the Company Store.  Disrespect for the worker of the very highest order.
Many say "This is her right as a CEO". True enough. As a CEO - she can do absolutely anything she chooses - as long as she keeps her Board of Directors and shareholders happy (profitable). But, I submit for your consideration, this thought. Is this a good leader? Is this a leader that underlings will follow? Will give their all for? Will speak highly of and respect? I think not. Does this speak well of the teamwork necessary for a solid future? I think not. 
An honorable person will do their job - all that they are paid for. They will even do it well. However, what many will NOT do is - well - anything they do not absolutely HAVE to do. Deliverables will be delivered. But will they be as good as they could be? Outstanding? Innovative? Probably not.   

As a mom, I was very disappointed with her choice to return to work so quickly after birth. I do NOT believe that one can do BOTH perfectly. Yes, in the last 30 years, we careerwomen/mom's have learned to let our houses go to some degree. We don't beat ourselves up (really hard anyway) because someone drops over and there is still the morning's dirty coffee cup in the sink or the Sunday paper is still scattered all over the floor.  But, we DO beat ourselves up over a missed recital or football game. We know that we have to make choice - some that we don't want to. Miss the recital or a due date.... And we are ok with the missed recital (barely) because we know that if we miss the due date, there might not BE another recital (due to terminal funds-a-low-a because of lack of a job).
Mom to mom, I cannot and do not look up to nor admire her choices.
                         _________________________________________

A little more about telecommuting for all the nay-sayers. 
For every one teleworker that goofs off, there are hundreds that go above and beyond. 
If you are a teleworker, you HAVE to be disciplined and dedicated. You have to set core hours for yourself. And you HAVE to be AVAILABLE. That is the down side of telecommuting. The lines of the work day blur - you have to accept that. Do not expect to turn your PC on at 8am and turn off your PC at 5pm precisely. More often than not (if you are a good employee), you won't. But, the flexibility to do a few loads of wash or put a nice roast on the table (and folks, if you think EITHER of these things takes time or is a distraction - then you aren't doing it right) - is well worth the workday blur.  
Internal chats - use them. Every company has some form of Instant Messaging available - use it. In my current position, my team has a team chat going 24X7. We use that chat just like we were in an office together. We throw ideas around, we teach, we learn, we inform, we collaborate to solve problems. We can share each our screens with each other.  Yes - we do occasionally throw some idle non-productive water-cooler chit chat about kids in there. We aren't robots - we are parent's and people. Most of all, we are a TEAM. I've only met ONE of them in person - but we are as much a team as any I have ever worked on.

When love is not enough

Note - the two links on this page are to completely opposing sides of the same story. 
I have actually been giving thought to a great deal lately that I have wanted to post about. However, the lack of time.......... well, you know how that goes. In any event, this particular thought has been rolling around in my head since I heard about the catastrophe at the Caboodle Ranch. 
Short background - Caboodle Ranch is in Florida.  A kindly retired man bought a large piece of property and gave a home to cats who otherwise would  have been euthanized or homeless. He built beautiful "CatHouses" and condos for them. He visited every one of them every day and knew many by name. He fed them, and when they became ill, cared for them with the help of a local vet. 
I first read about this amazing man and amazing ranch perhaps two years ago - and was inspired by what he was doing. I often thought that this might be something that I would like to do when I retired as well (mostly because I often find the company of animals far more comforting and pleasant than the company of many humans).  
In March of this year, he was arrested and all the cats removed from his property. This beautiful place was trashed, all the "CatHouses" destroyed. 
With something over 600 cats, its no surprise that not every cat was the picture of health. 
I am sure that the raid on the Caboodle Ranch was prompted by some animal-loving soul who only intended to do good - but, this person did not stop to THINK about the long-term consequences of their actions.

There are millions of homeless animals who either should or could be pets or, even sadder still, WERE pets. Through no fault of their own, they have no home. Local Animal Control services do what they can - but, often end up euthanizing perfectly healthy animals due to overcrowding. 
People give up their pets for many reasons. In this economy, the pet will often become another mouth to feed from a non-existent paycheck. Sometimes, people develop allergies or their children develop allergies - and a pet in the home becomes a potential death-threat for the allergic person. Some people give up their pets for stupid reasons too - like finding out that walking the dog at 6am in a foot of snow is NOT fun. 

Like people, there are pets fortunate enough to be with middle or upper class 'parents'. These pets often can get somewhere between good and tremendous care. That is why we have groomers and treats and special foods - because there are people who can and do care for their pets as they do themselves. These people can also afford to have their hair done professionally, manicures, pedicures, and day spa trips. This is NOT to say that these people are wealthy - just comfortable.
Also like people, there are pets whose humans can't afford to take them to the vet for every sniffle or can't afford a groomer or trainer and buy the popular or even grocery store pet foods.  These same people probably don't run to their own doctors often and utilize store brand foods themselves. But the humans can - and DO - give the best care they can and love to the animals that live with them. 
There is no price which can be placed on love.
One doesn't have to be a financially well-off person to provide a good home.

Animal rights activists often seem to forget this. In their quest to ensure that all animals are treated 'humanely', they lose site of what the definition of 'humane' is.  Humane means to treat others as you would yourself - or as you would treat another human. The owner of Caboodle Ranch did exactly that. He provided a place for cats to live. He gave them all as much care and love as he was capable of. Indeed, the cats were as human to him as any other human - and likely more human than many humans. Many of the cats that were taken in would have been euthanized. Many would have simply died on the streets of some city or become meals for other predators - predators they were incapable of defending against. He gave them a chance to live. He gave them food, toys, shelter, and care. The majority of the finances came from his own pocket. The love came from his heart.  
Animal rights activists would have you believe that he cared nothing for these animals, that he was cruel and ignorant towards them often ignoring their ills or wounds. That he did not provide veterinary care. They would have you believe he kept the cats in filth and squalor. 

With Caboodle Ranch gone, there are a few other places for cats with no home to go... but, for how long? How long will it be before the next place is also raided and destroyed by some well-meaning do-gooder?  

Now, I understand wanting the best for any living being - really I do. But, if the choices are to euthanize or give a chance at life - I'm for giving a chance at life - whatever form it takes.

Huh?

Yesterday evening, I thought I might go for a stroll - or as I call it 'Shell Shopping'. I give this nickname to my walks at the Audobon Coastal Center in Milford as the sandbar there has an oft-changing collection of sea shells - in particular Conch - which I have loved since I was a little girl. 

My first stop was a state park near Audobon called Silver Sands. To my dismay, at 7:41, the 'in' gate to the park was already closed.  In recent years, apparently, Milford has decided to roll the sidewalks up early - and it appears the state has acquiesced.....  

Interesting note, 'sunset' in New Haven yesterday according to an astronomy site I use, was 7:58. Now, if one wants to be a bean counter, the park was closed a full 17 minutes earlier than it should have been. 

Huh?

West Haven - where I live - for years, we did not roll up the sidewalks at all. We had a noise ordinance - so, 10PM on weekdays and 11PM on weekends - any loud noise (read: wild party with outside speakers at full blast) had to at least quiet down by those times. But there was nothing that said one couldn't walk the Boardwalk at 10 or 11 or even midnite. And I frequently saw people in my age bracket and older out walking the boardwalk - which is quiet beautiful - at 11:30 or midnite, sometimes even later. 

Salt water fishermen frequently went fishing off the city boat ramp and piers late at night as it is the outgoing tide which yields the most fish. 

We can no longer do that.

10:30 - everyone home and in bed or you get a ticket. 

Huh?

One has always needed a state permit to fish in fresh water streams in state parks. The monies garnered by these permits went into maintenance of the fisheries which stocked the streams maintained by the state. West Haven got on this bandwagon and one now needs a permit to fish in the salt water. The monies garnered from these permits goes............ ?

Huh?

New Haven now charges 10$ entrance fee for their one and only beach. That fee is for residents. Out of towner's pay 20$. To make this easier on the lower income folks, they gave them (gratis.. as in 'free') bus passes. So, now, these folks hop on a bus and come to West Haven to go to the beach. 

Huh?

The West Haven Police used to have 2 men in one squad car - partners.  Now they have 2 men in 2 squad cars - the theory is that they can cover more territory this way. But, for every call to which police must respond - TWO squad cars (and sometimes three)  are ALWAYS necessary - so the first has 'backup'. 

Huh?

A few years back, a law was enacted at the federal level to limit the quantities of pseudoephedrine which could be purchased by a consumer. Pseudoephedrine is a decongestant - once which, in my experience, works. There are only two other decongestants, which have at varying times, been available over the counter. Phenylpropanolamine - which was outlawed as totally unsafe in the 90's and Phenylephrine - which does absolutely nothing (imho) to relieve congestion. The reason for this law was to shut down meth labs. Since I can only purchase enough zyrtec-d (with pseudoephedrine) for one person, and my household has THREE allergy sufferers, two of us are miserable. And the meth labs are STILL FUNCTIONING!

Huh?

A question

Once upon a time, there was this war - it was maybe around 148 years ago or so. The war was one of the worst kinds you can have - that brother fighting brother thing was not a myth.
Anyway, there was this guy in a tall hat was the president at the time. He gave a speech one day. It was kind of interesting because in the speech, there were these words that he used - and are still used today to define the type of government that the United States of America is supposed to have.  So, this speechifying  thing - it was given from a place called Gettysburg in the state of Pennsylvania.

This man's definition went like this: "We here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain, that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom; and that government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth". 

So, I have a question... in 148 years - what the hell happened?

So, you were wondering

Why I mentioned Tigger's love of water, morning toilette, and the catchers-mitt style paws, eh?

As I mentioned earlier, my boys and I had a morning routine which pretty much involved making me as late to work keeping mom at home as long as possible!

Now, there were many ways to do this including just plain being cute - which, of course, they were masters of. 

But the very BEST way was to wait until I was brushing my teeth - which was the LAST thing that I did before leaving for work. This meant that the toilette was totally complete - the hair was perfectly styled, the make-up on perfectly, glasses completely spotless, suit or dress immaculate..... get the picture? 

At the brush-the-teeth point, 1/2 of the Inspection Committee gave up the ghost. Cuddles would jump down off the vanity and begin to hunt for the perfect 'nap spot'. Tigger did not move. Well...ok, he did not go searching for 'nap spot'. He did move...

The process for brushing ones teeth usually involved leaving the water (cold) running for the purpose of rinsing. Now, in order to ensure that one does not drool on ones perfectly-made-up chin, one must put ones face down into the bowl of the sink - fairly close to aforementioned running water.... close enough for cat-with-catchers-mitts-for-paws to put one very carefully placed paw underneath the spigot in such a manner that THE WATER SPRAYED THE ENTIRE BATHROOM SOAKING EVERYTHING IN A 5 FOOT RADIUS. This, of course, included me. 

Forcing a completely new toilette and outfit..........

And 45 minutes more of Mom's company..

Ah......... the sweet smell of success!

Still another Tigger Chapter

The 3 of us lived in quiet companionship breezing through our days happily. Over time, we developed our daily routine.

After a blissful night of sleep, the sun rose and my two children herded escorted me to the kitchen where they patiently waited for breakfast. Of course, they were only patient as long as I did not attempt to fix my coffee first. Once they had their soft food laid down, I was allowed to fix my coffee and attempt to shower and get ready for work. Of course – this process requires feline assistance.

Cuddles liked to sit on the hamper and play the game of ‘Beaver Slap’. This is usually played with both human hands and both front feline paw. Both parties make sort of a wheel-like motion in attempt to hit each other gently. Now, this game is usually played until one of the two parties – usually the feline – gets bored. Cuddles was very responsive to humans and the sound of ‘OW!’ was enough to get him to retract his claws if they happened to extend during the game. Tigger had no such restraints… hence my hands often looked like  shaved steaks.

Tiggers source of major amusement was water.

He loved it.

Faucets dripping, running, showers, toilets flushing – LOVED them! They were exciting sources of never-ending entertainment.

I’m going to remind you that this cat had SIX toes. If you’ve never seen a six-toed cat – how about the description of ‘Catchers Mitt’?

Having finished my toilette and dressed, I would attempt to put the finishing touches on – the makeup….. Generally I had one (male) feline on either side of the vanity ensuring that I (a female) placed the makeup on my face perfectly. My inspectors would watch carefully as I applied the base, blush, eyeliner, eye shadow etc….  If an error was made, my inspectors were sure to let me know with a quick swat of paws ensuring that I would need to start from scratch. This ‘inspection’ served a more evil purpose….. my darling sweet furbabies wanted me at home as long as possible – therefore, the more they ‘inspected’, the longer I remained home…….

Now, most days I passed inspection – much to their dismay. And briefcase over shoulder, I would head out the door to my home away from home.

Upon returning home from work – my children – who heard me coming from a great distance – would arise from their naps to greet me in the kitchen. There, I would give them the kisses and scritches  that they so richly deserved.

Of course, when  feline is told they are forbidden from doing something – it is the thing they MUST DO AT ALL COSTS!  This became yet another way in which my two furbabies conspired to have me leave the house later than I planned. – by ducking into the walk-in closet and hiding….. Which, of course, forced me to stop and look for them, pick them up and CARRY them out …  While one was being carried out, of course, the other was sneaking in…

In 1986, there happened to be a strike. As a manager, I was required to work long hours to assist in maintaining  'business-as-usual'. This meant that I was often gone from home for 16 hours a day (travel time included). 

One fine day, I left early in the morning, believing (mistakenly, as usual) that I had won the 'Closet' game (see above). I reached home at midnite and walked in expecting GREETING to take place. When it didn't - I became very concerned. I walked down the hall to the bedroom - hearing a very faint but plaintive 'mrower'. It took me awhile to realize that that sad little meow meant that I had lost the 'Closet' game.... BADLY! As I walked down the hall to let him out, I walked by the bathroom... and noticed a strip of something under my feet. However, I did not stop (at this point) to look closely as my priority was to let Cuddles out of the prison he had been in for 16 hours at this point! Poor little guy! Expecting puddles of piddle and other 'gifts' - I opened the door. He beat the fastest retreat ever - brushing my legs as a quick 'hi' - and racing right to the litter box! I was amazed to discover he had only left a small puddle the size of a quarter - that little boy had held EVERYTHING ALL DAY!!!!!! How AMAZING was that?! I was so proud of him - I started back down the hall to get some treats for my little boy .. and ... looked .. down... finally .... and looked carefully at the strips under my feet. They were pink. Funny... my bathroom toilet paper is pink. . . . . . . . . . 

HMMMMMMMMMMMM

Following the trail of 'strips' - I enter the living room and turn on the light to discover that my demur decor now has PINK STRIPES of toilet paper running ALL THROUGH IT!!!!!!!!!! 

And then I go to the bathroom.........

Yep. 

The DEMOLITION CREW HAS BEEN HERE!!!!!!!!

Every shampoo, condtioner, soap and towel that had been on the lip of the tub was IN the tub. EVERY Q-tip had been REMOVED from the box (of 500) and either cleverly hidden or beaten to death. (Did I mention that Tigger liked Q-tips?) The hamper was pushed toward the tub by several feet. The wastebasket was tipped over. The rug had been pushed so that it was tucked between the toilet and tub. Everything that was on top of the toilet tank was now UNDER it. And the piece de resistance? The vanity / sink - ALL ITEMS from top were now IN sink with the ash tray remains as the topping! 

Oh yes - and there was absolutely NO TOILET PAPER LEFT ON THE ROLL!
TIGGER THE TORNADO WAS MAD!!!!!!!! 

How DARE Mom lock his BEST buddy in the closet all day and leave him NO ONE TO PLAY WITH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The NERVE of her!!!!!!!!!!!!