Still another Tigger Chapter

The 3 of us lived in quiet companionship breezing through our days happily. Over time, we developed our daily routine.

After a blissful night of sleep, the sun rose and my two children herded escorted me to the kitchen where they patiently waited for breakfast. Of course, they were only patient as long as I did not attempt to fix my coffee first. Once they had their soft food laid down, I was allowed to fix my coffee and attempt to shower and get ready for work. Of course – this process requires feline assistance.

Cuddles liked to sit on the hamper and play the game of ‘Beaver Slap’. This is usually played with both human hands and both front feline paw. Both parties make sort of a wheel-like motion in attempt to hit each other gently. Now, this game is usually played until one of the two parties – usually the feline – gets bored. Cuddles was very responsive to humans and the sound of ‘OW!’ was enough to get him to retract his claws if they happened to extend during the game. Tigger had no such restraints… hence my hands often looked like  shaved steaks.

Tiggers source of major amusement was water.

He loved it.

Faucets dripping, running, showers, toilets flushing – LOVED them! They were exciting sources of never-ending entertainment.

I’m going to remind you that this cat had SIX toes. If you’ve never seen a six-toed cat – how about the description of ‘Catchers Mitt’?

Having finished my toilette and dressed, I would attempt to put the finishing touches on – the makeup….. Generally I had one (male) feline on either side of the vanity ensuring that I (a female) placed the makeup on my face perfectly. My inspectors would watch carefully as I applied the base, blush, eyeliner, eye shadow etc….  If an error was made, my inspectors were sure to let me know with a quick swat of paws ensuring that I would need to start from scratch. This ‘inspection’ served a more evil purpose….. my darling sweet furbabies wanted me at home as long as possible – therefore, the more they ‘inspected’, the longer I remained home…….

Now, most days I passed inspection – much to their dismay. And briefcase over shoulder, I would head out the door to my home away from home.

Upon returning home from work – my children – who heard me coming from a great distance – would arise from their naps to greet me in the kitchen. There, I would give them the kisses and scritches  that they so richly deserved.

Of course, when  feline is told they are forbidden from doing something – it is the thing they MUST DO AT ALL COSTS!  This became yet another way in which my two furbabies conspired to have me leave the house later than I planned. – by ducking into the walk-in closet and hiding….. Which, of course, forced me to stop and look for them, pick them up and CARRY them out …  While one was being carried out, of course, the other was sneaking in…

In 1986, there happened to be a strike. As a manager, I was required to work long hours to assist in maintaining  'business-as-usual'. This meant that I was often gone from home for 16 hours a day (travel time included). 

One fine day, I left early in the morning, believing (mistakenly, as usual) that I had won the 'Closet' game (see above). I reached home at midnite and walked in expecting GREETING to take place. When it didn't - I became very concerned. I walked down the hall to the bedroom - hearing a very faint but plaintive 'mrower'. It took me awhile to realize that that sad little meow meant that I had lost the 'Closet' game.... BADLY! As I walked down the hall to let him out, I walked by the bathroom... and noticed a strip of something under my feet. However, I did not stop (at this point) to look closely as my priority was to let Cuddles out of the prison he had been in for 16 hours at this point! Poor little guy! Expecting puddles of piddle and other 'gifts' - I opened the door. He beat the fastest retreat ever - brushing my legs as a quick 'hi' - and racing right to the litter box! I was amazed to discover he had only left a small puddle the size of a quarter - that little boy had held EVERYTHING ALL DAY!!!!!! How AMAZING was that?! I was so proud of him - I started back down the hall to get some treats for my little boy .. and ... looked .. down... finally .... and looked carefully at the strips under my feet. They were pink. Funny... my bathroom toilet paper is pink. . . . . . . . . . 

HMMMMMMMMMMMM

Following the trail of 'strips' - I enter the living room and turn on the light to discover that my demur decor now has PINK STRIPES of toilet paper running ALL THROUGH IT!!!!!!!!!! 

And then I go to the bathroom.........

Yep. 

The DEMOLITION CREW HAS BEEN HERE!!!!!!!!

Every shampoo, condtioner, soap and towel that had been on the lip of the tub was IN the tub. EVERY Q-tip had been REMOVED from the box (of 500) and either cleverly hidden or beaten to death. (Did I mention that Tigger liked Q-tips?) The hamper was pushed toward the tub by several feet. The wastebasket was tipped over. The rug had been pushed so that it was tucked between the toilet and tub. Everything that was on top of the toilet tank was now UNDER it. And the piece de resistance? The vanity / sink - ALL ITEMS from top were now IN sink with the ash tray remains as the topping! 

Oh yes - and there was absolutely NO TOILET PAPER LEFT ON THE ROLL!
TIGGER THE TORNADO WAS MAD!!!!!!!! 

How DARE Mom lock his BEST buddy in the closet all day and leave him NO ONE TO PLAY WITH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The NERVE of her!!!!!!!!!!!!